Let’s Talk About “Smooth”

It may be the most ubiquitous descriptor in drinks. Is it also the most reviled?

The Bordeaux-bred, Brooklyn-based spirits importer Nicolas Palazzi traffics in stories—of the alchemists along the river Charente, whose Cognacs capture the essence of the surrounding vineyards and microbiota; of the artisans in northwestern France, whose Calvados express the nuance of dozens of cider apple varieties via a single bottle. Palazzi’s company, PM Spirits, identifies itself as a “provider of geeky spirits.” Part of the job, indeed, involves geeking out, luxuriating in the details and conveying them to potential buyers. It’s an arrangement that hinges on dialogue, governed by the imprecise linguistics of wine and spirits. Descriptors and analogs form bridges to connect one’s palate and sensibility to another’s. But all it takes is one word to dissolve the connection entirely.

“If their reaction is, ‘Oh, that’s smooth,’ it just tells me that I probably have not identified my customer as well as I thought I had,” Palazzi tells me. “I’m not upset at the person saying ‘smooth.’ I’m upset at the waste of life—it’s basically a sign that says ‘You just wasted your time.’”

Harsh words for a word that literally signifies the opposite. But language matters. The lingua franca of booze is inherently nebulous, and it requires calibration. A trained nose and palate can instantaneously identify a range of aromas and flavors and free-associate memories and feelings, which all become pinpoints tracing a constellation, giving shape to a ghost. The term “smooth” effectively erases any point of reference. Even as an adjective, “smooth” functions as a verb: It is the buffing out of character, the sanding down of the distinctions that make great spirits great. In the quest to triangulate the specific qualities of a spirit, “smooth” instead forms a binary of acceptability. It is a value judgment on whether or not one finds the spirit drinkable, one that can easily be impressed upon an unwitting consumer. This is exactly why the term is so ubiquitous in the marketplace, and—for decades, if not centuries—a red flag among connoisseurs.

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Cognac Hommage a Yves & Jean-Noel Pelletan 

This limited-edition, single-cask cognac (along with a few demijohns) consists of a blend of eaux de vie that was distilled between 1925 and 1965, so this is truly a taste of cognac history. Just 870 bottles were released this past October, and it was named after a father and son cooperage team who hold the title of Maitres Artisans Tonneliers and are important figures in the cognac category. This is truly a legendary spirit that will not reappear.

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Don’t have a bottle of Cognac on your bar? You should.

Cognac—which is a type of brandy (we'll get to that)—has always had an unfairly snooty image. It’s the building block for the Sidecar and the original Sazarac—real down-to-earth cocktail classics. As a result of the French embrace of Black servicemen in World War II, they drank it often. Before it was getting shouted out by everyone in rap, from Tupac to Drake, Hennessy became the first spirits company to place ads in Ebony and Jet magazines. (It was also was omnipresent at my cousins’ weddings at Chinese banquet halls, where there was a bottle of Hennessy on every table, right next to a two-liter of 7-Up for mixing.) Cognac has history, and it's not just pinched-face old white guys in smoking jackets swirling snifters, is what I'm saying. So yes, while you can easily shell out thousands of dollars for aged Cognac in Baccarat crystal, there are great bottles at every price point.

Best Bang-For-Your-Buck Cognacs

Paul Beau VSOP

None of the Cognacs in this category are what you would call cheap, but the idea here is value. “Paul Beau VSOP is an exquisite spirit that sells for around $60, but what makes it a great value is that this VSOP is really an average age of 15 years old,” says Thorn. “This could be labeled as an XO, which would typically fetch at least $100.”

Guillon-Painturaud VSOP Grande Champagne

Similarly, Guillon-Painturaud VSOP Cognac is also an average age of fifteen years old, far exceeding the VSOP designation. “Line Guillon-Painturaud produces on her family’s 18 hectare estate, and she is one of the few female master distillers in Cognac,” Thorn says. “Her Cognacs are elegant and fruit forward, and they are ridiculously good value considering the ages that are in the bottles.”

Navarre Vieille Reserve

“Navarre Cognacs are such a treat. Jacky Navarre is a fourth-generation distiller, and his production methods are slow and old-school. He hand-harvests the grapes, distills in small batches, and does not reduce with water, but instead allows reduction to take place only in barrel over time. The average age is 40 to 50 years old. Navarre Vieille Reserve is around $250 retail, and it is worth it.” —Kellie Thorn

Straight From the Barrel

“...Hommage a Yves & Jean-Noel Pelletan, the rare cask-strength Cognac, has a boldness that belies the softly nuanced quality its category is known for.”

How Cocktails Are Helping Armagnac Reinvent Its Image For A New Generation

La Boutique Des Vins in Toulouse’s historic Carmes neighborhood is one of the more popular spots for local residents to browse for just the right wine or spirit, maybe even a craft beer. On a quiet Friday evening when store traffic was still sparse, Noémie Cassou-Lalanne arrived in the hopes of convincing customers to reconsider a traditional spirit that might only rarely be on their shopping list.

Surrounded by a nook of shelves filled with wine bottles, teas, and chocolate bars, Cassou-Lalanne set up a small table and a silver tray with three bottles of Armagnac from the Pellehaut domaine in the Gascony region where she’s in charge of marketing. She then improvised a small bartending station, complete with cutting board, mint leaves, a pestle, tiny umbrellas, ice cubs, and simple syrup to make Armagnac Mojitos.This reimagined cocktail used two types of Armagnac that this artisanal industry hopes will revitalize the image of France’s oldest eau de vie. The first, L’Age de Glace Château de Pellehaut, is a light-brown blend of Armagnacs that have spent little time aging a barrel. The other is Blanche Armagnac, a clear white spirit that has not been aged.

Queen Snake - Shannon Tebay, Death & Co.

INGREDIENTS

Serving: 1

• 1 1/2 ounces blanche de armagnac, preferably Cobra Fire Eau de Vie de Raisin

• 1/2 ounce Clear Creek Douglas Fir Eau de Vie

• 2 teaspoons lychee liqueur, preferably Giffard Lichi Li Lychee Liqueur

• 1 teaspoon crème de cacao, preferably Marie Brizard

• 1 lime shoulder

DIRECTIONS

1. Express lime, leave in bottom of a Sazerac glass.

2. Combine all ingredients and stir to integrate.

3. Top with cracked ice.
   
   

Claire de Montesquiou plunged into Armagnac 30 years ago with her husband after living in England. They bought Domaine D’Espérance and began to restore its vineyards. They believed the clay soil on the far western part of the official Armagnac region would yield high-quality grapes. Three decades later, they’ve developed a strong international reputation while also staying small. “I make small quantities of high quality,” she said. “It’s like if you wanted to compare haute couture to ready-to-wear.”

She’s also brought a willingness to experiment. Several years ago, she connected with Nicolas Palazzi, a Bordeaux native who had moved to New York City where he worked as an importer and brand ambassador. Palazzi was passionate about Armagnac, but he felt it was too complicated to explain to bartenders and potential customers. “The fact that it’s called Blanche Armagnac makes it really hard to sell in my world,” he said.

Cobrafire, eau-de-vie raisin

He worked with de Montesquiou to create a product called Cobrafire. Rather than sitting in a still container for 3 months and having water added, the Armagnac is distilled at a lower alcohol rate, bottled after one month, and then sold as an “eau-de-vie raisin.” 

“I’m a big proponent of putting stuff in a bottle at its natural proof,” Palazzi said. “If you try it and you like it, and then you need to add water to it, then you can do it. But it’s not someone in a lab deciding for you.”

It’s a sharp break with tradition. But Palazzi said Armagnac makers need to take some chances if their product is going to reach a wider audience.

“What we’re trying to do with Cobrafire is to reframe things so that people are interested,” Palazzi said. “We’re trying to sell something really good. I want to let people discover the work of distillers who really care about their stuff.”

L'ENCANTADA XO ARMAGNAC

L'ENCANTADA XO ARMAGNAC  - a collaboration between PM Spirits and armagnac cask hunters L’Encantada, this blended spirit is one of the most complex brandies in the world. The release is comprised of four different casks curated by L’Encantada with vintages ranging between 1987 - 1997. Each one was produced by distillers who create in the heart of their fields with a mobile alambic armagnacais still before the spirit matures in oak in Gascony. Only 1,600 bottles are available at a cask strength of 46.8% Abv.